The Opportunity of Choice

Problems are free, but you can convert them into opportunities.
Opportunity to solve an interesting problem.
Opportunity to connect.
Opportunity to create, learn a new skill, make a commitment, speak up, be generous, do your best work, ask interesting questions, help someone who needs you, care, smile, and show up. You have the opportunity to make something that matters.

The problem with opportunities is that you have to make choices. You have to take the risk and the responsibility. You have to acknowledge that it could not work, that it could be uncomfortable, and that you could be rejected. We live in a world that's still filled with prejudices, limits, and barriers, where too often, people are judged and criticized. It may not be fair, but it's true.

On the other hand, if you care enough and choose to make it personal, you can act with generosity, learning on the journey, and you could make all the difference for the better.

Nothing that’s worthwhile is ever easy. Remember that.
― Nicholas Sparks

Show Your Work

You can't find your voice if you don't use it.
— Austin Kleon

Showing your work is not about how brilliant or talented you are. Showing your work is not about being in the spotlight or pleasing others. The decision to show your work is to make your work better, so you can act generously and contribute, adding value.

It's tempting to wait until you are ready, but the truth is that we never are. We learn in the process of sharing ideas and in our daily connections. Our work evolves when we show it in public. We learn to give more, to care, and to help others.

There is no perfect way to start. Austin Kleon says that the best way to get started on the path to sharing your work is to think about what you want to learn and make a commitment to learning it in front of others.

You are responsible for making things happen. Today is the best day to start.

The benefits of delegating responsibility as a leader

We have entered an era of accelerated change, where a culture of trust, giving employees autonomy, open communication, and collaboration are critical for success.

Part of being an effective leader is to be surrounded by competent people, clarify expectations, and let them work. Leaders are responsible for developing their teams. Delegating responsibility is a powerful way to develop and reaffirm your trust in your team.

Effective delegators know that they can’t accomplish everything on their own, so they encourage employees to take on tasks that fit their skills and interests (having taken the time to learn what those skills and interests are). They also ensure their team has everything they need to do their job and provide constructive feedback.

 Here are some recommendations to avoid the most common mistakes:

• Set clear expectations. Focus on what is the expected outcome and not on how the task should be resolved.

• Confirm that the person selected understands and is committed to the assignment.

• Define the employee's authority level.

• Avoid Perfectionism. Looking for perfection prevents people from taking risks or exploring new things. Mistakes are part of the learning process; ensure that your team takes the time to reflect and learn from them.

• Encourage collaboration. The most important things usually are done by a team. It's the power of collaboration that make things happen.

• Follow up and provide coaching and guidance if needed.

Empowering people not only help them grow and reach their potential but also is a critical driver for a company's success. Your team needs to feel valued and know their opinions matter to achieve the best results.

Sign of Character

Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.
― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Modern personality theory suggests that personality begins with inborn temperament. Over time, you develop your character as you engage in everyday experiences, and that’s how your personality evolves. The character represents your ethical, moral, and social attitudes and beliefs.

Character is a choice and is reflected in how you respond to different circumstances. Character and virtues will be reflected in how you think, feel, and behave. Character will be reflected in how you treat and respect others.

Developing your character is not always easy because, most of the time, it requires you to go for the long, slow, and more difficult path. Developing your character requires intentionality, acknowledging that you are not perfect, nonetheless overcoming your faults, and having the strength to improve yourself.

You will see the result not by the measure of success but in your pursuit of good.

Growth needs the right environment

When you are surrounded by people who care —a community who wants to learn from each other,  to do work that you are proud of, to seek to make a difference, and add more value—you know that you are on a powerful path to generate possibility.

Surround yourself with people who inspire you to improve, people you can learn from, and who are willing to help you grow from your mistakes. People who want you to become the best person you can be. Tony Robbins says: "who you spend time with is who you become! Change your life by consciously choosing to surround yourself with people with higher standards!"

Don’t underestimate the courage it takes to change environments and the effort it takes to adjust to a new one. It can be intimidating and challenging. You may even fail. But it’s worth the risk and effort. Life is too short to waste; it’s not a dress rehearsal, and it’s the only one you get.
— Don McMinn

You’re the average of the people who surround you.

Human skills

Human skills matter. Sometimes called "soft skills," these are often the hardest to master.

Courage, justice, integrity, empathy, self-control, adaptability, resilience, creativity, collaboration, communication, patience, kindness, credibility, and respect. All these are human skills, and you can learn them. If you only focus on what is easy to measure, it is possible that you are not expending the right energy and effort on critical human skills.

It may be time to focus on growing people in a way that can’t be measured by a number.

It may be time to focus on the skills that make humans indispensable.

Be kind

"Being rude is easy. It doesn't take any effort and is a sign of weakness and insecurity. Kindness shows great self-discipline and strong self-esteem."
— Unknown

Rudeness is everywhere. People are rude and disrespectful when they act impolite, inconsiderate, or mean toward someone else. Being rude is easy. You have a hard day; a stranger cut you off in traffic, a coworker is mean to you, your computer breaks down...

Treating people with kindness is not always easy, especially when dealing with rude people. When you are kind, you enjoy your days more, and you encourage others to spread respect. When you choose to be kind, you grow in humanity, self-esteem, and strength.

More important, you might consider treating people with kindness because you can and because it reflects the person you choose to be.

The benefits of the doubt

Have you observed yourself interacting with people that you just met? Who gets the benefit of the doubt? We all have biases. Unconscious biases are everywhere.  The challenge, then, is to be aware of our biases and decide how we want to act with the people around us. Are you willing to give the benefit of the doubt to someone who doesn't look or talk like you?

If you don’t choose behaviors beyond your natural instincts for what you like and don’t like, you will miss incredible possibilities in your life.

The benefit of the doubt radiates possibility.

The Productivity Paradox

Many people are working more than ever (nearly 50% of employees and 53% of managers report that they’re burned out at work) at the same time; leaders have concerns if hybrid work is being productive, so most employers are offering return-to-office incentives.

This disconnect is reflected in a recent survey by Microsoft. This research shows that most employees (87%) report being productive at work, but only 12% of leaders have confidence that their team is productive.

As leaders, we are responsible for bridging the productivity gap between leaders and employees. Some critical steps are aligning work with the company strategy, clarifying expectations, and defining the most important things to be done.

However, the most probable cause of this paradox is a low-trust culture. Trust is confidence. It is the belief that someone or something is reliable, good, honest, and effective. When you trust people, you have confidence in them—in their integrity and their abilities.

Building trust is one of the most critical challenges facing our society today. As Stephen Covey mentions in his book The Speed of Trust: “Trust always affects two outcomes—speed and cost. When trust goes down, speed will also go down, and costs will go up.”

If we want to bridge the gap between leaders and employees regarding productivity, we need to reinforce trust. And the behavior that best creates credibility and inspires trust is acting in the best interest of others. Talk with your team. Clarify expectations and understand how they perform best.

The way companies approach the next phase of work — embracing the positives and learning from these challenging years — will impact who stays, who goes, and who ultimately seeks to join your company. Your choices as a leader will make all the difference.

How to find the best candidates

Having the right members on your team will make all the difference in your organization. We need to remember that businesses don't compete. People do. People create value. As leaders, we are responsible for investing the time and energy to find these people and provide them with the right environment to succeed.

One of the most important things I have learned in talent search is to hire based on values, character, and not just skills.

In an interview process, you can learn what the person is doing by asking the right questions. You can learn their ethical standards and critical judgment. Another not minor topic is understanding how the person thinks about continuous self-improvement, habits, and attitude to confront challenges.

Caring about their answers is part of generating the right conditions where the person can be seen and heard. To get the most value from the process, it is important to be trusted, authentic, casual, and, if possible, avoid the office. Invite the person to take a coffee. You will have the opportunity to see how the person interacts with others.

Ask questions that you really want to know the answer to. As Clayton Christensen says, "Without a good question, a good answer has no place to go." Invite the candidates to tell you stories, so they can show you the behaviors and values of how the person responds to different situations. When you ask for a story, you have a higher probability to get the closest version of the truth. Here are some curated questions that I found insightful that could help you identify the right talent for your team:

1. Tell me about a specific time when you had to handle a tough problem that challenged fairness or ethical issues. What happened, and how did you respond? (Warren Buffett)

2. How did you spend your morning today? Use this question to learn about their daily habits and also help you get people into conversational mode. (Tyler Cowen and Daniel Gross)

3. What is one of the best or most worthwhile investments you’ve ever made? (It could be an investment of money, time, energy, etc.) (Tim Ferris)

4. When was the last time you "broke the rules"? What was the situation, and what did you do? (Warren Buffett)

5. What's something weird or unusual you did early in life? (Tyler Cowen and Daniel Gross)

6. Tell me about one of the most difficult problems you’ve worked on and how you solved it. (Elon Musk)

7. When working with people, how would you describe your preferred relationship with them? Use this question to assess honesty and the capacity for open communication. (Warren Buffett)

8. What values do you appreciate the most in a team environment? Use this question to look for other trustworthy traits, like fairness, transparency, and inclusiveness —all hallmarks of integrity. (Warren Buffett)

9. What important truth do very few people agree with you on? This question sounds easy because it’s straightforward. Actually, it’s very hard to answer. It’s intellectually challenging because the knowledge that everyone is taught in school is, by definition, agreed upon. And it’s psychologically difficult because anyone trying to answer must say something she knows to be unpopular. Brilliant thinking is rare, but courage is in even shorter supply than genius. (Peter Thiel)

10. In the last five years, what new belief, behavior, or habit has most improved your life? (Tim Ferris)

11. Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?' (Martin Luther King, Jr.) 

Take the time to rethink the people search process. Be clear about your values and those things that you will not settle. Hire people better than you. People who can look beyond, think about continual self-improvement, and at the same time seek to develop others. Hire someone that you would follow.

Dark side of gratitude

Gratitude is the quality of being thankful. It's about focusing on what's good in our lives and being thankful for the things we have.

In positive psychology research, gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Harvard Health Publishing explains that gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.

However, there is a dark side of gratitude. Several research shows that there are situations when being grateful could do more harm than good.

According to the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, expressing one’s thanks in the context of an unequal power relationship can help solidify the power hierarchy and undermine protest by members of the low-power group. 

Another dark side of gratitude is when we feel trapped in seeing the good in everything, and if we don't acknowledge our own emotions, we could be ensnared in toxic gratitude. If we force ourselves to feel thankful and hide our real emotions, this can generate stress and frustration that is detrimental to our mental health.

Acknowledging the contrast between the bright and the dark side of gratitude in our life doesn't invalidate all the positive things; on the contrary, it enhances it. As humans, there are moments when we can be so grateful that we forget that we have the right and the responsibility to set boundaries, accept the moment we went through, and work toward something better.

The power of introverts

We live in a society that overvalues extrovert people. Most people admire the type of person who's confident and comfortable in the spotlight. In the workplace, extroverts are usually perceived as better performers, are highly recognized, paid more, promoted faster, and are the stereotype of the expected behavior. However, as Adam Grant says, what matters is the competence people possess, not the conviction they express.

What is an introvert?

An introvert is a person predominantly concerned with their thoughts and feelings rather than with external things. Introverts prefer quiet, minimally stimulating environments, while extroverts need higher levels of stimulation to feel their best. Usually, people are not wholly extroverted or introverted but a mixture of both. However, everyone is more inclined towards a particular personality type.

Susan Cain explains that: It’s important to understand that introversion differs from shyness. Shyness is the fear of negative judgment, while introversion is simply the preference for less stimulation. Shyness is inherently uncomfortable; introversion is not. The traits do overlap, though psychologists debate to what degree.

Advantages of being an Introvert

Many people incorrectly think it is better to be an extrovert rather than an introvert. However, there are many benefits to introversion. Here are a few advantages of being an introvert:

• They're good listeners,

• They're deep thinkers,

• They're more creative,

• They think before they speak,

• They're observant,

• They’re thoughtful networkers,

• They’re compassionate leaders,

• They don't seek external validation,

• They're independent,

• They may speak less, but when they do – they make their point well,

• They can really focus,

• They're completely happy being alone.

Famous Introverts

• Abraham Lincoln,

• Eleanor Roosevelt,

• Albert Einstein,

• Rosa Parks,

• Mahatma Gandhi,

• Barack Obama,

• Emma Watson,

• Steven Spielberg,

• J. K Rowling,

• Bill Gates,

• Warren Buffett,

• Mark Zuckerberg,

• Marissa Mayer, and

• Elon Musk.

Introverts as Leaders

There is a misconception that introverts can't be good leaders. According to Adam Grant's research, introverted leaders sometimes deliver better outcomes than extroverts do. Introverts are more likely to let talented employees run with their ideas rather than trying to put their stamp on things. And they tend to be motivated not by ego or a desire for the spotlight but by dedication to their larger goal.

How to bring out the best in each other?

As an introvert who has spent many years working with extroverts, my experience shows that we can have the best of each other when we create and promote an inclusive environment. As leaders, we are responsible for creating an environment that respects and empowers our differences to unlock the potential of our team. Here are some recommendations:

• Have an awareness of your team's personalities and in which conditions they perform their best.

• Seek to understand the experiences and diverse perspectives of others. Practice active listening to learn more about your team.

• Create the right conditions for everyone to speak up. Promote an environment where everyone can participate and share their ideas. Invite people to listen, participate, and provide equitable treatment. Ensure that all voices are heard and respected.

• When you need your team's input, send the request in advance. Allow time for preparation and thought.

• Provide opportunities for private working (for introverts.)

• Make no assumptions about the best way to work with your team.

When we value our differences and respect each other, we all grow.

We need margin for thought

Our minds need space to think.

Research on naps, meditation, nature walks, and the habits of exceptional artists and athletes reveals how mental breaks increase productivity, replenish attention, solidify memories and encourage creativity.

Paradoxically, when we get to rest, when making time for mental downtime and space for inaction, that space gives the right conditions that strike inspiration, connect some dots, and even get things done later.

According to Scientific American, downtime replenishes the brain’s stores of attention and motivation, encourages productivity and creativity, and is essential to both achieving our highest levels of performance and simply forming long-lasting memories in everyday life.

Keeping daily routines that give our mind some clean space for thought gives us margin for all the rest of life’s messiness that we cannot control. It also could remove future obstacles so we can do our best creative work when we next sit down to create.

What practices do you have to put your mind at rest?

The world needs us as we are

"your son may have down syndrome,” the doctor told us, but we would never have imagined what happened next.

Massimo was born on December 2017. At that moment, we already had two children, so we felt really confident, and we assumed that we were prepared for the third one, but we definitely were not prepared for that notice.

The following days were full of tension when we went through the medical exams. Because of his condition, he potentially had severe complications, including heart defects, immune system problems, hearing loss, etc.

As soon as we confirmed that Massimo was born healthy, we decided to move forward.

I remember that I was worried about how little I knew about having a child with down syndrome (honestly, I didn't know anything).

What I couldn't imagine at that moment was that Massimo would come to teach us.

Massimo changed our family life, only for the better. He's the real master at our home of what it really means to be resilient, perseverant, brave, and funny! Yes, he makes our day full of joy!

He teaches us how many things we take for granted, like learning, walking, jumping, speaking, or reading. He teaches his brother and sister what deep empathy really means. When we are running trying to get everyone ready for school, he shows us that we need to make a stop to really see them. Or when I am working late, and he closes the lid of my laptop, so I can go to play with them. (And he always understands when is a really good moment to stop).

In the beginning, it was not easy. And every day is a challenge, a challenge that is really worth going through. Since he was born, I took the decision to raise my voice to transmit that having a baby with Down syndrome is not a tragedy. This is not a sentence for his life, and yes, he will probably face challenges, but he also has gifts and the potential of great talents such as great empathy, creativity, and deep caring.

People have a habit of setting limits, and we really need to figure out how far children can go.

Have you ever wondered what is normal?
Imagine if the best compliment you could receive: "Wow, how normal you are!" Compliments are "you are extraordinary," "you are outstanding," or "you are exceptional." If people want to be these things, why are so many people striving to be normal? Why are people looking to fit in...

People are afraid of diversity and unconsciously try to force everyone, even those who don't want to be carved, to become normal.

Diversity enriches our humanity and makes us better. Our sensitivity, our humanity, and our compassion make this world better.  Let us respect life, nature, and its diversity.

The world needs us.

Simplify the way you do things

Simplifying is a mindset. Simplifying is a skill. There is a Spanish idiom that says "drowning in a glass of water" to refer to people that get overwhelmed by ordinary circumstances. We often find people trying to get as much information as possible before making a decision. Or also that focus on irrelevant details or overlook the obvious. They have analysis paralysis. Too much information includes misinformation or information that it's not doing to predict or explain the future.

Also, some people have the ability to deconstruct, break down problems into its components, and make things easier and simpler—people who know that not deciding has a cost.

We are living in an increasingly complex world. If you want to thrive, you need to keep things simple. More information doesn't equal more knowledge or better decisions.

Former Secretary of State Colin Powell has a particular approach to making tough decisions. He called it the 40/70 rule. He says that every time you face a tough decision, you should have at least forty percent and at most seventy percent of the information you need to make the decision.

In Seeking Wisdom from Darwin to Munger by Peter Bevelin, in one of his Guidelines to Better Thinking, he discusses Simplification as one of the twelve tools that provide the foundation for rational thinking and help us make better decisions.

Former General Electric CEO Jack Welch said: "You can't believe how hard it is for people to be simple, how much they fear being simple. They worry that if they're simple, people will think they're simple-minded. In reality, of course, it's just the reverse. Clear tough-minded people are the most simple."

Warren Buffett agrees: "We haven't succeeded because we have some great, complicated systems of magic formulas we apply or anything of the sort. What we have is just simplicity itself." Charles Mungers adds: "If something is too hard, we move on to something else. What could be more simple than that?"

Simplifying is a skill, and you decide to work on it.

How to run better meetings

Meetings occupy most of the time in our daily agenda. According to The Economist, before the pandemic, managers were spending an average of 23 hours a week in meetings, and now that the barriers to calling people have come down, it's even higher. The 2022 Microsoft Workplace Trends Report found that weekly time spent in meetings had increased by 252 percent for the average Teams user since February 2020.

Meetings are important for connection and collaboration. However, long and large meetings are costly and, most of the time, are considered a waste of time for the participants. Bad practices in meetings impact the engagement and productivity of the organization. But it doesn't have to be that way.

There are many resources on how to make meetings better. Here are some suggestions that will help you make the most of the time spent in meetings:

1. EVALUATE FIRST

First, even before scheduling the meeting, evaluate if this is the best way to get what you need:

• Do you need a question answered? Pick up the phone and close the topic.

• Are there difficult or sensitive issues? Resolve it in a one-on-one meeting

• Is it a recurring meeting with no news or updates? Cancel the meeting. Please don't hold a meeting only to bring people up to date. (Send it by email.)

• Ask yourself: Do we really need this meeting? Would something happen if we skipped it?

2. BEFORE THE MEETING

A. Planing

• Have a clear purpose for the meeting

• Evaluate what is the most productive way to share this information

• What will be your role in the meeting? Are you there to push a group to a decision? Are you responsible for making a decision? Are you seeking information? Etc.

B. Prepare

• Who needs to attend? Keep the audience as small as possible.

• How much time is needed? Keep it as short as possible and no longer than one hour. Consider blocks of 25 or 45 minutes so people can have a space between appointments.

• What preparation would help? Is the meeting going to be in-person, virtual, or hybrid?

C. Communicate in advance

• Develop an agenda, assign owners and time to each topic

• Communicate the purpose of the meeting and be clear about the expectations

• Send the agenda and supporting material in advance

3. DURING THE MEETING

• Start and finish on time. End early when possible.

• Assign a note-taker and timekeeper

• Recap the meeting's purpose.  Ensure participants know the agenda and goal of the meeting.

• Stay on the topic.

• Avoid distraction. Invite people to be fully present. If it's possible, ban devices.

• Wrap up. Conclude with a summary, clear the next steps, and establish accountability.

4. AFTER THE MEETING

• Send brief notes to meeting attendees and people who were absent, focusing on the following: Decisions made; and actions, items, and owners.

• Review what worked and what didn't. Take note for next time. Ask for feedback.

You don't need research to prove how much time we are wasting in meetings because they need to be more effective, although there is plenty of data about it. We can make better use of everyone's time by taking some actions. Time is one of our most scarce resources. Start by challenging the next meeting you organize.

Download this chart in pdf.

How are you preparing to anticipate change?

Change is a constant in life. Are you preparing to anticipate it for your business or your life? Take a moment to reflect on it: What are you reading? What questions are you asking? Who are the people that you are talking to? Are you aware of new trends?

If you are not prepared, you will be a creature of circumstances. If you are not prepared, it may be too late to get ready, respond to the market requirements, and acquire the skills needed. As a business, you could disappear. If you don’t take responsibility for your world, someone else will. 

How are you looking to anticipate change?
The answer is in your calendar.

You can create your future.

Marcus Aurelius on Each of Us lives Only Now

Marcus Aurelius, nicknamed The Wise (April 26, 121–March 17, 180), is considered the last of Ancient Rome’s Five Good Emperors and one of the most influential Stoic philosophers.

Meditations is widely considered to be one of the most influential books ever written. It's a timeless collection of his personal writings and is considered a portal to his inner life. Meditations has been consulted and admired by statesmen, thinkers, and readers throughout the centuries.

The questions he tried to answer in Meditations are timeless. Still today, we ask ourselves: Why are we here? How can I cope with the stresses and pressures of daily life? How can I do what is right? How can I cope with loss and pain? How can I handle misfortune? How do we live when we know that one day we won’t?

Here are some lessons from Marcus Aurelius's considerations on the topic of our impermanence and how to live a good life:

• "Forget everything else. Keep hold of this alone and remember it: Each of us lives only now, this brief instant. The rest has been lived already or is impossible to see."

• "Concentrate every minute like a Roman—like a man—on doing what’s in front of you with precise and genuine seriousness, tenderly, willingly, with justice. And on freeing yourself from all other distractions. Yes, you can—if you do everything as if it were the last thing you were doing in your life, and stop being aimless, stop letting your emotions override what your mind tells you, stop being hypocritical, self-centered, irritable."

• "Do external things distract you? Then make time for yourself to learn something worthwhile; stop letting yourself be pulled in all directions. But make sure you guard against the other kind of confusion. People who labor all their lives but have no purpose to direct every thought and impulse toward are wasting their time—even when hard at work."

• "Even if you’re going to live three thousand more years, or ten times that, remember: you cannot lose another life than the one you’re living now, or live another one than the one you’re losing. The longest amounts to the same as the shortest. The present is the same for everyone; its loss is the same for everyone; and it should be clear that a brief instant is all that is lost. For you can’t lose either the past or the future; how could you lose what you don’t have?"

• "Forget everything else. Keep hold of this alone and remember it: Each of us lives only now, this brief instant. The rest has been lived already, or is impossible to see."

How to lead in tough times

We are living in a moment of multiple disruptions, like the global pandemic, supply chain challenges, market uncertainty, and restructuring of companies. At the same time, people bear the weight of what is happening in their personal life. Also, In many cases, personal things are affecting their families, their lives, and those they love.

The question at these moments is how to stay positive, and sometimes, the right answer is not to be.

Sometimes, expressing positive sentiment is the most tone-deaf and ineffective thing we can do. It could create a gap between the leader and their teams. It could lead to a crisis of confidence and trust.

Recognize that there are times when things are clearly not okay.  Instead of trying to be happy and positive when things are tough, we must focus on what's possible. Focus on what we can control and ask people for their perspectives.

As leaders, we are humans first. We must remember to act with humanity, kindness, and empathy and feel comfortable letting people see that we acknowledge that things may not be okay but that there are opportunities to move forward.